Scout Cuisine (or Lack Thereof)

Boys are pragmatic vestiges of our hunter-gatherer past who see little reason to linger lovingly over the preparation or consumption of food. Left to themselves I believe they would gravitate towards gobbling down whatever fistful of uncooked food was most convenient.

Prepared meals, as we know them, would grow ever more rare. As a matter of fact if it were not for microwave ovens and instant macaroni and cheese cooking would be in danger of disappearing altogether. The menus our Patrols develop for a weekend camping trip are studies of efficiency in time and motion.

Meals consist of foods that require minimal manipulation of the ingredients.

Recipes aren’t lists of ingredients accompanied by instructions for preparation but mere directions, rarely more than four in number:

  1. Open package

  2. Add contents to boiling water (or vice-versa)

  3. Wait a minute or two

  4. Enjoy your ‘meal’ (In many cases steps two and three can be eliminated) Any Scout who bothers to combine multiple ingredients, adds seasonings, or offers a meal constructed of two or more components is admired for his patience and skill.

Standards of edibility are so minimal that one wonders if they exist at all, There is little differentiation between burnt and raw, stale and fresh or dirty and clean.

Thankfully the dog-like digestive system of the average Scout is able to process food that many of us would have difficulties consuming. Like most Scoutmasters I make occasional efforts to improve conditions. Most of my suggestions are are met with a familiar look of hopelessness and disgust. Once in a great while a Scout or two will discover the magic of dutch ovens and revel in the careful preparation of wonderful meals. This bright little flame of hope is often short lived.

Whatever my expectations or aspirations I am reminded that when Scouts have prepared their simple fare they have accomplished something that few of their peers have. When they hunker around a campfire with the fruit of their labors (however horrid I feel it may be) it is usually thought of as the best meal they have ever eaten.