Hitting the Wall

Marathon runners sometimes experience a sudden loss of energy that they call “hitting the wall.” They pass through an invisible barrier, and their get-up-and-go gets up and leaves.

Youth leaders are especially susceptible to hitting the wall, and most do at some point. Communication breaks down, nothing seems to work, and what once seemed simple becomes hopelessly complex. Frustration and feelings of inadequacy follow.

We can’t avoid the wall. Everyone is going to hit it, and most have already seen it happen to others. The good news is that recovery is possible, and forward movement can resume.

So how do things get back on track? The following points outline a practical approach.

1. “Hitting the wall” is almost inevitable.

Forewarned is forearmed. If this is expected, it becomes easier to recognize and respond. The barrier is invisible, so its exact timing varies, but in practice youth leaders often hit it a couple of months into a position of responsibility.

2. Reactions to “hitting the wall” are predictable.

A common first reaction is avoidance—what might be called “playing possum.” The opossum responds to threat by remaining quiet and still, hoping not to be noticed.

Adolescence carries an unwritten rule against asking for help or admitting mistakes. When youth leaders hit the wall, they often respond by hoping no one notices.

But others do notice, and the response at that moment matters.

3. Calling to account with cheerfulness and encouragement.

When a normally engaged and positive youth leader withdraws, there is usually a reason. Frustration is often accompanied by embarrassment. Responses may include bluffing, anger, or silence.

The key is to separate the problem from the person.

Young leaders often assume that a problem means something is wrong with them. At that age, sensitivity to judgment is high, and it can feel as though everyone is watching critically.

A useful approach is to begin with simple questions that define the issue:

“What’s the plan for the meeting (campout, hike, etc.)?”

The response is often improvised:

“Uh, we are going to do this, and then this, and then this…”

“Can I see the plan? You have notes or something, right?”

“Uhhhh, no, not really.”

“Would it be fair to say you just came up with that when asked?”

“Ahhhh, yeah, kind of.”

“So what have you been doing over the past few days to prepare?”

“Well… not much, I guess.”

“Do you think that’s what your Scouts expect of you?”

“No.”

From there, a broader question helps shift thinking:

“What do you think we have a right to expect of someone in this role?”

They will usually describe those expectations themselves.

“It sounds like you’re running into difficulty making those things happen. Why do you think that is?”

The conversation continues to identify the problem and outline steps to address it.

Throughout, the goal is to speak as an impartial observer. Not what you did or didn’t do, but what anyone in the role would reasonably be expected to do. The problem is not personal—it is something everyone encounters.

“I know this feels discouraging, but this isn’t about you. Every leader, including me, runs into situations like this. The important thing is to get back up and keep going. You’ll be fine.”

4. Follow up with continued encouragement.

Follow up after a few days. Look for even the smallest sign of initiative—sometimes it takes effort to find it. When it appears, reinforce it with encouragement.

The wall is unavoidable, but recovery is achievable. That recovery depends largely on how the situation is handled. It may take more than one attempt, but with support, most youth leaders regain their footing and move forward again.